Memory of Dreaming

I would have loved you.
Do you remember beer and pizza,
new friends and old,
and the excitement of late summer
in a new city?

I would have loved you.
Do you remember a kiss by the bushes,
the sweetness of birdsong,
and the tender words of a budding romance?
How we shared that hope?

I would have loved you.
Do you remember how odd it was,
to feel a heart so long gone cold
warming to love again?
We agreed, it was quite strange.

I would have loved you.
Do you remember how excited you were,
a freshman with all knowledge at
your fingertips? I saw that,
and I loved your enthusiasm.

I would have loved you.
Do you remember how you loved God,
and how I admired your faith?
When I found out you'd lost it over the years,
for a time I thought less of you.

I would have loved you.
Do you remember how you played guitar,
and sang there in your dorm room?
I think now you were waiting for something.
I know then I did nothing.

I wouldn't have loved you.
Did you know how far I'd hidden
in my thoughts, wrapped myself in mirrors
to keep the light from penetrating?
I haven't changed much.