Why You Never See Poetry Online

"You can't write poetry online," they say,
"There's no market for it."
Craven, knee-padded, cowardly, unimaginative pricks.
(They're all a bunch of limp-wristed jagoffs,
if you ask me.
They're just afraid of the comment section.)
Put your money where your mouth is, you lousy bums,
unless you're too busy sucking Robert Frost's dick!

"Oh God, technology's so alienating," they say,
"We just can't say what we mean anymore."
Well, lemme tell you something kid:
don't write a damn poem if you're scared to say what you mean.
Not in the twenty-first fucking century.
What, are you scared you'll piss somebody off?
Scared you'll hit a nerve?
Scared you might have to start caring?

"I tried my best, I really did," they say,
"These people... they just didn't understand my genius!"
Look at you. You're pathetic.
(Don't worry, I mean them, not you.
You're special, of course, and women can have penises, and whatever.)
Don't pretend to try if you're not gonna do the damn thing.
If you're a genius, be a genius,
and make it look easy for the rest.

"I just don't have time," they say,
"I don't have time and I get so tired."
You wanna hear the truth?
You're a coward, and you know it.
You wouldn't still be here if it wasn't true.
You're scared to take charge of your own life,
and it's why you like hearing me talk this way.
It's nice to hear somebody say what you're always thinking.

"But you're wrong," they say,
"You don't know the first thing about me."
True. But I know your kind.
Too scared to stand up for yourself, right?
I know your kind. I hang their heads
over my fireplace.
Silent. Weak. Passive.
Too scared to speak up and defend themselves.

"You can't write poetry online," they say,
"There's no market for it."
Bleating sheep getting led over a cliff...
If you can get your lips off of Robert Frost's cock
for a solid five seconds, do me a favor:
make this go viral. Make it explode.
Be part of something amazing.
It would make me very happy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Would you care to take a look at my Facebook page?

If you enjoyed the poem, it would mean a lot to me if you could share it with your friends. Thanks!

(Photo credit: "internet" from x61.com.ar on Flickr)